Lately I hate everyone around me.. What is wrong?

Hate is a strong emotion that can dissipate relationships and prevent new ones from sprouting. There are many factors that can influence emotion. These factors include environment, anger, pressures/stress, and emotional insecurity.


1. Environment

You may have heard the statement, “We are products of our environment.” The environment in which you live can have an impact on the way you deal with emotion. The word ‘environment’ consists of socio-economics, family patterns, and ascetic environment (the actual place you live in). These aspects can influence how you project emotion. Humans often take on traits of those who raise them. For some this may be a parent, for others it may be a close friend, relative, or even a teacher. Scientifically, at a young age, we are taught to mimic those in authority over us, learning social order and how to survive. If your authority figures often project hate, you might become susceptible to mimic this action later in life.

Hate is an emotion produced by a chemical reaction in the brain. But did you know that certain colors can influence the way the mind works? Scientists have found that color not only affects your mood but also affects your behavior. Your ascetic environment could be influencing the way you feel, and it could be a link to your hate problem. For example, some scholars believe the color red evokes the feeling and behavior of hate.

Socioeconomic environments might also play a role in the mass production of hate within the self. For example, if you come from an elite family you may feel stress or pressure to remain elite or socially accepted. If you come from a middle class family, you may feel the stress for success. If you come from a family in poverty, you may feel the stress for survival and for success. Continue reading to learn how stress and pressure have a direct link to the projection of hate.

2. Anger

According to James Whiney Hicks M.D., in an article posted by Yale University Press called Fifty Signs of a Mental Illness, “Hate is a chronic form of anger…Persistent hate usually reflects a failure to utilize more constructive coping strategies to resolve angry feelings.” Below are a few healthy ways to cope with anger from Judith Orloff, M.D.

a.) Count to 10.

b.) Cool off.

c.) Take time to address the anger.

d.) Don’t address anger when you are tired or before bed.

3. Pressures/Stress

A result of stress can be anger, and anger can cause hate. The symptoms of stress can include worry, moodiness, chest pain, and even depression. If you can control stress, you can limit the amount of anger in your life, which has a direct effect on hate.

Stress Relievers

a.) Find an activity you love and enjoy it during times of stress.

b.) Exercise – exercising releases chemicals in the body that can make you feel good.

c.) Relax! – take time to read, do yoga, or just rest.

4. Emotional Insecurity

Hate can often stem from insecurities within the self. For example, you might be insecure about your appearance and hate those you find more attractive than yourself. You might hate those you perceive as better at a particular talent. Whatever the case, emotional insecurity has a direct link to both self-hate and hating others.

Steps in fixing emotional insecurity

    a. Acknowledge the problem.Acknowledging that you are emotionally insecurity is the first step to curing your hate. Emotional insecurity is a complex issue and has no quick fix. Emotional insecurity can stem from issues of sexual abuse, emotional abuse, and many other factors. Professional help is recommended when trying to overcome deep-rooted emotional abuse.

    b. Write down all the positive attributes about yourself.Writing down the positive attributes about yourself can help you realize all of the wonderful things about you. This can build self-confidence and usher in a positive change in your life.

    c. Post your list somewhere you can see it every day.Posting your list in a place where you can read it every day will help you to acknowledge the positive attributes about yourself on a daily basis. Over a period of time this can help you develop a positive outlook about yourself.

5. The People you Associate With

As human beings, we are often molded or influenced by the people with whom we associate. Often, the people around us influence our speech, education, general health, career path, and even our emotional patterns. For example, if Billy surrounds himself with people who value education he may earn good grades in school. This is an anthropological theory in which humans change behaviors in order to assimilate into society. If you are surrounding yourself with people who are consistently angry, you might find yourself projecting hate. If you surround yourself with others who do not deal with stress well, you might find yourself projecting hate. We can assume this because of the relationship between stress, anger, and hate. If you surround yourself with people who hate others and hate others often, you may find yourself projecting hating.

    a.) Analyze your social groups, especially the ones you spend the most time with. What is the content of your conversations? How do you feel after talking with them?

    If your conversations are often hateful towards each other or others, then your social group might be the cause of your hate problem. If you find yourself stressed or pressured after talking with your social group, they might be the source of your hate problem.

    b.) Talk with your social group and ask for support.

    Asking for support from your friends will help affirm your problem with hate and will give you guidance toward finding a solution.

    Hate is a power emotion that can be very toxic to your wellbeing. I hope that you discover the source of your hate and follow through with steps that will decimate the negative effects the emotion has on your physical and mental well-being.

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